Funny Baby Quotes
A collection of funny baby quotes and sayings that will make you smile. Many of us who have had babies can relate to the expressions and opinions in these quotes. So if you need a smile read our collection and remember no matter what situation you are facing it is better to smile!Think about it.
Marshall McLuhan
Making the decision to have a child is momentous.
It is to decide forever to have your heart
go walking around outside your body.
Elizabeth Stone
Families with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other.
Ed Howe
Who is getting more pleasure from the rocking, baby or me?
Nancy Thayer
The joy of having a baby today can only be expressed in two words: tax deduction.
Author Unknown
A perfect example of minority rule is a baby in the house.
Milwaukee Journal
If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time," you're the grandma."
Theresa Bloomingdale
No one likes change but babies in diapers.
Barbara Johnson
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.
Leo J. Burke
I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted baby food.
Robert Orben
Children are a great comfort in your old age - and they help you reach it faster, too.
Lionel Kauffman
It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.
Barbara Kingsolver
A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to be.
Author Unknown
The quickest way for a parent to get a child's attention is to sit down and look comfortable.
Lane Olinghouse
There are three reasons for breast-feeding:
the milk is always at the right temperature; it comes in attractive containers; and the cat can't get it.
Irena Chalmers
A baby is an angel whose wings decrease as his legs increase.
Author Unknown
Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.
Jean Kerr
A baby is a blank check made payable to the human race.
Barbara Christine Seifert
There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and his mother's age.
Dr. Benjamin Spock
I don't know why they say "you have a baby." The baby has you.
Gallagher
Even when freshly washed and relieved of all obvious confections, children tend to be sticky.
Fran Lebowitz
The child supplies the power but the parents have to do the steering.
Benjamin Spock
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
Franklin P. Jones
Raising kids is part joy and part guerilla warfare!
Ed Asner
Having a baby changes the way you view your in-laws. I love it when they come to visit now. They can hold the baby and I can go out.
Matthew Broderick
A crying baby is the best form of birth control.
Carole Tabron
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing.
Phyllis Diller
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.
Jimmy Piersal
I can't think why mothers love them. All babies do is leak at both ends.
Douglas Feaver
First you have to teach a child to talk, then you have to teach it to be quiet.
Prochnow
The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents.
John J. Plomp
Human beings are the only creatures on Earth that allow their children to come back home.
Bill Cosby
Having a baby is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head!
Carol Burnett
Ma-ma does everything for the baby, who responds by saying Da-da first.
Mignon McLaughlin
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Quotes on Babies
Baby Steps Poem
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